♡ Fullmoon ♡

Jauh kah hamba dari-Mu, Tuhan?
Karena raga ini menangis menjelang malam,
Selalu takut kehilangan...

Jauh kah hamba dari-Mu, Tuhan?
Karena dahaga tak bisa hilang,
Jiwa ini kering...
Dan disaat hati mengeluh lelah, tak ada yang membantunya pulih...

Jauh kah hamba dari-Mu, Tuhan?
Karena diri ini dengki melihat keberhasilan,
Dan dagu ini terlalu tinggi sehingga menyombong menganggap remeh orang,
Padahal aku tak punya apa-apa...

Tuhan, aku ingin menyembah-Mu sepenuhnya...
Membungkuk serendahnya...
Mengucap sabda sebanyaknya...

Aku ingin menangis karena merindu-Mu...
Hingga lelah dan terlelap,
Aku masih ingin menyebut asma-Mu...
Mengharapkan ridho-Mu...

Kumohon, bantulah aku...

✩ Syarah Habibah Balqis - 24 June 2016 ✩

All of these thoughts are exasperating. Ever since you judged me as a sinful person. Ever since you judge me how filthy I am. How disgraceful I am. And how I am so different from your perfect lady-like ex. Your dream and perfect woman. That I am no more than a barking dog. I even start to dislike myself. Hate myself.
.
.
.
But then you came again. Said you was wrong. Said I am your perfect lady. Said everything that can make any woman kneel. And you said sorry.
.
.
.
It was all fake. That all of your words are fake. That this feelings we develop each others were a lie. That you want to see me no more. That you only came looking for an entertainment, amusement. Since I am the fool. And you succeed.
.
.
.
May God bless you always.

✩ Syarah Habibah Balqis - 07 Des 2016 ✩,